BONJOUR FROM LE SWAGTONSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS


ahoyyy losers!!!! im blogging from le hamptons... ehem...le swagtons. thats right, i'm on a writers retreat. Anthing for the blog! 

i hopped on le L.I.R. and got le fuck out of dodge(bushwick). im literally typing this next to crashing weaves! oui, its mega cold, but its new england af and thats writer vibes af. I wish i could have lugged my typewriter here but its broken again. A typewriter and a bottle of jack daniels by le sea is like the great american writer cliche. Gatsby and all that! 

i wish i had a bunch of nautical sweaters etc but today im yet again wearing fur, skinny jeans, ballet flats, and my vice sweatshirt (for shits and gigs). I do have some forever21 sailor shorts avec moi ... and a few sailor hats.... but my room is more boho chic than boat vibes anyways. on vacation- sometimes its best to match le decor.

SWAGTONS PACKING LIST: 
-wannabe-balmain white skinny jeans
-red lipstick, mascara, red nailpolish
-saddle shoes, lanvin flats, white topshop sneakers, gold gladiator sandals
-little black dress, little blue dress
-white prepschool blazer
-gold leggings, black leggings
-white polo shirt, wifebeaters
- black sequin cardigan, blue sequin top
-sequin captains hat, white captains hat, black sailor cap
-thongs, bra, socks, tights
-diet cokes
- aa batteries
-books for real and fake reading
-gold bikini
-2 glam nightgowns
-forev21 sailor shorts, sequin shorts
-sunglases af
-2 packs of marb lights
-laptop, paper, pens


this look i put together at home before i realized it would be just as cold at the beach, if not colder, than in new york. i brought it anywayz... you never know.. maybe ill wear the bikini in bed to read. the ensemble was inspired by a recent anna del russo instagram post where shes wearing phillosphy by lorenzo serfaini. perfect outfit perfect look. Love her. Def will be ripping that one off alllll mf summer. 


this is what i wore to travel (avec the coat, flats, etc...)



now lets move back in time a bit..... before i began this blogcation. what was I up to?? 

tbh: a little this ... a little dat.... 



i started filming my little video blog... I worked a bit... 


....I went to my fave totally shit bar ever for the first time in a year. dont worry it was fucking empty. I really really really really really missed peeing selfies in disgusting restrooms. and vodka with a little water. 








.......I madeout with KISS and we wrote accrostic poems for eachother and then on eachother. when i woke up my entire torso and top were dyed red. sigh... i miss kiss! 









...annnd i remembered my shopping bag obsession. decorating walls with luxury shopping bags was or is a thing. its totally fucking tacky fashion blogger bullshit soooooo i really reccomend you all do it ASAP. frame them if you wanna be double chic. Meg hack: hang a bung from your ceiling like a chandelier.  






im still working on my shopping bag decor but enjoy the breakfast at tiffanys cat inside. he's obsessed with shopping bags too, its extremely swag of him. 

If you're into the idea of decorating with shopping bags, let me lead you a bit further down the rabbit hole . ..

I want you to carry empty or almost empty designer shopping bags with you everywhere you go. or at least some of the places. i could wax onnn about irony/delusion/capitalism/consumership.... bla bla bla fucking blaaaaa. But i wont because most fashion writing fucking BLOWS bitches. all im gonna say is this: carrying empty shopping bags for faux rich bitch energy  is the most obnoxious, stupid thing you could do. so do it! get in the mindset of the girl who hangs her victoria secret bags on her wall and take a balenciaga bag out for a mf walk. it WILL make your outfit look swagg-er. 

disclaimer: do not do a whole photoshoot moment for instagram. Obvi take tons of pics.. but take cutttty pics... not some contrived photoshoot of you with a million shopping bags in your shitty apartment. The vibe needs to be out and ABOUT. 

now, im sure you're thinking "but meeeg where do we get the shopping bags if we aren't actually buying anything??" answer: go to stores and ask sales people, usually they're surprised and say ok (do not be embarassed if the say no, who effing cares), buy them for like a dollar on ebay and poshmark, or take people who actually buy fuggly balenciaga shit full price's shopping bags. 

"whhhaat brands???"". anything. i think its bessst if the brand contrasts with your outfit honestly. like boho yoga clothes and a chanel shopping bag... a club dress and a brooks brothers shopping bag...  you get my drift. 




please try this dear readers.
let moi know how it goes s'il vout plait.

im going back to staring at le beach from my bed.

till next time- namaste. 























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